ironies in life

i vowed to love you forever.. you and you only.. no one else but you…
i never once stopped loving you.. i will never stop writing my love for you..
it hurts baby.. i’ve lost all strength to go on.. lack the determination and will to love you..
i need more time, more god.. need more faith, and most of all… i need you

why do i give up on life when i wrote i would hold on to love..
why do i praise my god when i refuse to even listen to him..
why do i love you when i don’t even love myself..
why do i try and smile everyday when my heart is crying inside..
why do i continue to stay in this artificial fantasy when my baby is waiting for me to wake up…
WHY????

*maybe you are right, i don’t mean what i write…
if i did.. i wouldn't be acting like this..
if i did.. if only i did...